No, I'm not calling you fat, I'm wishing you a happy Chinese New Years! It my year, the year of the OX! I'm going to pwn all of you with my might.
In other news, I actaully have Chinese relatives, they are great. For the last 11 or so years we've been celebrating the Chinese New Years by going to REALLY effing big banquet halls, always chosen by my Chinese Grandma, and eat lots of Chinese food, that is usually not vegetarian, so I usually just sit there and gawk. This year was extra special because it was a seafood place. So, no Veggie Lo Mein at this joint. There was, however, mined pork on the vegetarian part of the menu, because pig is a vegetable. Obviously.
BUT NORA! In the middle of the plate is an enormous pile of sauteed onion, you love onion!
Actually, its sea cucumber... whatever that is. Surrounded by all sorts of other fish, meat, and meat with pieces of things, around the pile.
-my Chinese grandma viciously shouting at waiters, she's an intense lady, don't fux with her
-eating a beer, or two or three, for sustenance
-watching the STRANGEST tv program on the mulitple TV's in the hall